Yesterday I told my Lovely Partner that the babysitter said Sunshine likes to go to sleep with her hand around the babysitter's finger. I told the story in a "Isn't our baby the sweetest thing ever?" way.
Lovely said "She does that to Babysitter too?"
I nodded.
Lovely looked sad and said "Sunshine thinks of you as her family, but I'm just one of the other favorite babysitters."
And then I felt sad for Lovely, even though I don't think it is true. And if it IS true now, I am sure it will change.
In a not unrelated note, Lovely tells me about once a week how pissed she is at Re.becca Walker.
http://feministlawprofs.law.sc.edu/?p=3579
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
What a sad moment for Lovely. Sounds like she's feeling a bit rejected. Is there anything special that just she and Sunshine share?
Yeah, they have bath time which is just for them-- which Sunshine loves! Also, they actual have more cuddle time. Sunshine gets distracted about nursing when we cuddle, so its easier her to cuddle with Lovely.
I think Sunshine is just looking for the Mom with Milk sometimes, and that is why I think it will change as she gets to be older.
It really is hard, that part. It is challenging to find your place as the non-birthing parent, whether a man or a woman, but I think men are more conditioned to accept their position. We read an interesting anthology called something like "confessions of the other mother" written by the non-bio moms of kids conceieved in lesbian relationships. It has some good nuggets and may be a good read esp for Lovely.
We still struggle with the issue ourselves though and my son is 3 (he has been weaned since 18 months)... It breaks my heart sometimes too...
Post a Comment